Two weeks from today is surgery day!

Tim and our dear friend Dana Anderson, who is donating one of her kidneys to him, signed the official paperwork last week and made it through the pre-op steps. They are both ready for August 19. Dana, who has solid taste in music, quoted the great Tom Petty when she said “the waiting is the hardest part.”

This journey officially started in March of 2018 when Tim was placed on the kidney transplant list. He is definitely one of the lucky ones to match with a living donor (three actually) and not have to be placed on dialysis. A pre-emptive kidney transplant is considered the preferred treatment for end-stage kidney disease, but only about 20 percent of kidney transplants are performed pre-emptively in the U.S.

He is in good spirits but slowing down as his kidney function declines. We played golf with friends Saturday and after we rounded the first nine holes, he was pretty wiped out. I’m completely jealous of his ability to nap. And sleep.

Many of you have asked questions about the surgeries and aftercare so I’ll attempt to answer some of those here:

Dana will arrive at Integris by 5:30 a.m. and Tim by 8:30 a.m. She should be in recovery by noon and him by 2:30 p.m. They will probably both be in the hospital through Thursday after their surgeries on Monday. Tim won’t be able to have visitors in his room while at Integris other than immediate family. His nurse said friends will be able to wave at him through the window in his door. Please don’t send flowers or plants because he can’t have them in his room.

Depending on how everything goes, Tim will likely be off work for six to eight weeks. Fortunately he has the kind of job that when he feels up to it, he can start working remotely but he won’t be able to go back to the office until plenty of time has passed and his immune system is ready. He’ll be on a pretty restricted diet for a while as well. I see lots of yummy, homemade soups in his future. It’s one way to get him to eat vegetables.

He’ll be closely monitored to check how well the new kidney is working and to make sure his body is not rejecting it. He’ll have blood tests two to three times a week and have his medications adjusted as needed. He will take immunosuppressants or anti-rejection medications for the rest of his life to help keep his immune system from attacking and rejecting the new kidney, and to keep infections away as much as possible.

Tuesday morning, August 20, we’ll be going through what Nurse Ashley describes as Bootcamp. I just hope she doesn’t expect me to do any burpees! She will actually be educating us on all the rules for life after a kidney transplant. She already told me to go to Sam’s and buy a big bottle of hand sanitizer and paper masks so when friends come to visit, they’ll be protecting Tim from anything they might bring into our home.

After our meetings last week, it became completely clear to me. I was not meant to be the donor because the follow-up care would have put such burdens on our kids and others. It is not an easy surgery for Dana. It will be hard on her family. The good news is that I will be able to help provide care for her and Tim. We are truly thankful to be surrounded by a faith family at First Presbyterian Church that will make sure no one goes hungry for food, prayer, support or love.

Friends and family traveling this journey with us, thank you! So many continue to reach out and ask what we need. I promise I’ll let you know when something comes up. For now, we ask for your prayers for Dana and her family, and for Tim and our family. Tyler, Elyse, Mary Emma, Sarah and Nathan and will be here. Bonus for the four adults – they get to see Hamilton while they’re all here and the grandparents get to babysit the cutest little 10-month-old ever.

We are hosting a Perfect Match celebration the afternoon of Saturday, August 17 so we make sure Dana and Tim feel loved, supported and blanketed in prayer. The kids and I are having fun thinking of kidney themed treats! Share any great ideas you have too. And feel free to join us that afternoon – either in person or in prayer as we prepare for the next step in this journey.